It’s been another hard week as I’m sure it has been for many! The only thing I can do is smile. Yes, I have struggled with my health terribly. Yes, I have had to deal with pain and heartache. However, I’m still here and I’m still standing (just 😷) . What could I possibly have to smile about? Well, where do I start?
I have been so extremely ill but have been surrounded by love and care. I have had to go through some intense interactions but I have been supported and listened to. I have been caught in difficult situations but have been shown compassion and help. So, yes in a strange way, despite my suffering I can still smile. I am happy to know how loved and supported not just me but my family really are!
I wish sometimes I could be a stronger person but in reality, I am only human. As I sat on my son’s bed this morning I saw him sleeping peacefully. My body was on fire, I felt exhausted beyond explanation and my head throbbed. I cried. Not because I am unhappy but because I don’t want my illness to beat me or destroy me. Watching him sleep so peacefully, I wept for my life before FND. I have so much to live for. My wonderful boys, Mr Right and my other close family and friends. I know that I’m deteriorating and I MUST listen to my body. I let my tears flow and took a deep breath and decided that today, like so many other days, I will fight. Why? Because I have no other choice!
I am really looking forward to a nice, restful weekend with my little family. Rest and recuperation is my only plan. I hope that my fellow FND sufferers keep up the fight. There is always hope that one day our pain will ease but until then, let’s keep spreading awareness in the hope that one day someone might find a way to help!
Thanks for taking the time to read my story.